He approaches you with a big smile, reeking of alcohol, and buries his sweaty dirty face into your clean(ish) white t-shirt. He does this every single time he sees you. He disrupts everything when you see him. I “struggle to love” Ronald.

When we lived in Birmingham, we hung out and ate pizza every week with some of the city’s down and out and there was a man there a lot like Ronald that I also “struggled to love”. His name was… Ronald.

He was loud, had a bad attitude, and sometimes started fights with some of the other people there. He was disrespectful to Bekah and everyone else around him. He never smiled.

One day as he waited in line to receive some food that wasn’t quite ready, I felt God tell me to just talk to him and ask him how he was doing. So I did. Ronald lit up like a amusement park at night. His bad attitude immediately left and he told me about how much he loved to eat and that he really enjoyed the food we brought. We talked about life and how hard it was sometimes.

After that day, Ronald became one of my favorite people at the park. He started to show more respect to Bekah and the other people there when he was around. He always smiled.

I’ve tried to figure out what these guys tap into that is inside of me because it’s obviously something God wants me to figure out and deal with. A mentor early in my walk with Christ told me that he used to struggle to love people so he volunteered at his church to greet people as they walked in. He said he intentionally hugged everyone that walked through the door and by doing this he began to get to make friends with everyone. He looked forward to it each week. He told me that through this God taught him that we are all equals and that we all needed to be loved.

Today I am praying that I have the courage to see the Nica Ronald the same way I saw the Bham Ronald – As an equal. As a brother and a son of the living God.

[Image Source]

There is a pastor who is talking at the end of the movie and he tells the story about God showing him a vision. In this vision he was in a church and this church was filled with drug addicts, prostitutes, gang bangers, drug dealers and all sorts of criminals and outcasts. They were in this church and they were doing everything wrong. They were doing drugs, selling drugs to each other, fighting, having sex in the pews and acting like they would on the streets. In the vision, the pastor was running around  and frantically trying to get everyone to stop what they were doing. He was so frustrated that he yelled out “If you’re not going to honor God’s house and respect this house then get out!”. He said exactly what the majority of leaders or pastors would say if this was going on inside their church.

It was at this point he heard the Lord say to him, “Why would you send away what I sent in? Why would you send away what you’ve been asking for?”. The pastor replied, “God I didn’t ask for this?” and God said, “You asked me for the lost. Now keep it simple. Love them and let me change them.” The pastor goes on to share how this changed his entire view about church and evangelism. He learned that it’s not about pointing out to people what they are or are not doing but what Christ is inviting them to – “love me and I’ll change you”.

Some things I learned from the movie:

• Love really is the answer to the world’s problems
• “God loves pagans and witches a lot. It’s just unfortunate that sometimes we don’t.” – Phil Wyman
• When the world was a mess and needed to be saved, God did not save it by condemning behaviors – he saved it with Love
• God really is doing incredible and amazing things in the world
• My new job gives me the amazing opportunity to tell some of these stories to the world

I am in need of monthly supporters who will partner with me in telling the amazing stories of God’s love conquering darkness all over the world. If you want to help make a kingdom impact on a world who is desperate for change please consider being a part of my ministry. You can give financially or contact me to become a prayer partner.

As long as I’ve known Frank, he’s been fascinated by sunsets. Our favorite date was to grab a blanket, find a spot, and talk while the sun went down over a mountain. How awesome for him to be called to a place that has the most amazing sunsets, night after night.

“Stop and talk to him” God says.

“But why? How? I’m not fluent enough to carry on a conversation. And what would I even say to him?” I say back.

“Tell him that I love him.”

At this point in the dialog I am well past the man and I tell myself, “Ok if he’s there when I run back by I’ll stop” and I keep running.

As I continue to run and think about what just happened I am sure that God was speaking to me so I am eager to get back to the man. I approach the spot where I saw him but he is no longer there. I missed my chance to see God at work. Was I supposed to pray for him? Was God going to set him free from some life-controlling addiction or illness? Was he going to speak to me through him? Was he an angel?

[Image Source]

I am filled with feelings of conviction. If only I had stopped and been obedient. What was it God was going to do?

I ask God to give me another chance. I promise him that next time I will stop. I will listen instead of doubt. He tells me there will be a next time.

Recently we finalized the next step in our lives. After months of prayer, Frank has formally accepted a position on the mobilization team of Adventures in Missions. We are excited to work with an organization we have grown to love and believe in. Frank will be helping AIM in their mission to raise up a generation of radically committed disciples who will take the Gospel to the ends of the earth. What an incredible opportunity! Although we still don’t have direction on where we will be geographically long-term, we do know that we will be in Birmingham for the next year or so. Next week, Frank will be traveling to Georgia for a retreat with my new team. Please pray for him as he meets the team for the first time in person, and as they plan out the next year of activities.

Life here in Granada has continued to be eventful. Here are a few things we’ve been up to:

Rebekah: Ambassador Trip

I was given the opportunity to lead a team of eight girls on a month long trip to Nicaragua. The trip was part of the Ambassador Program at Adventures in Missions. We prepared for the trip with a week of training camp in Gainesville, Georgia. It was an amazing experience, with over 30 leaders and staff preparing for a summer full of trips. It was incredible to see God moving in all of these people as well as the 200 teenagers we were leading. God made himself present through musical worship and prayer. During the trip, I become “mom” to the girls and at the end of our time together had a hard time letting go of them. I was so humbled to be part of the next generation of Christians, and full of hope for our future as a church.

Frank: Solo Por Hoy

When I first started Solo Por Hoy, I prayed that it would would gain momentum and that the Nicaraguans would take ownership of it and that is exactly what has happened. The group meets twice a week and despite a couple of setbacks, God refuses to let it fall apart. We have two solid leaders in place and I feel that the program has gained the momentum needed to ensure that it continues after we leave. I plan on returning as often as I can to oversee everything and also to be blessed by being a part of something so incredible. I have seen lives changed right in front of my eyes. I have witnessed people choose a life with Christ instead of a life of drugs and addictions. It has been so humbling for me to be a part of this here and I hope to start similar groups just like this wherever I go.

Natalia

We’re happy to report that Natalia’s sewing business is up and running! Over the past two months, she has sold dozens of dresses, scarves, headwraps and other goods to the teams visiting our ministry. She has also opening up a bank account and has deposited her earnings. Through our support, her husband has also obtained his work papers and driver’s license. He hopes to find employment as a driver as soon as possible. I sit in awe of how God has used your money and prayers in her life. I see a woman with hope for the future, and a marriage that is stronger now than it was six months ago.

Preparing for Home

We’ve begun the countdown to our flight home and are beginning to pack up our supplies. If you are visiting us in the next month and a half, you can expect to carry home a variety of supplies and belongings, from cookbooks to pottery, baskets to can openers. Our hearts are already heavy to say goodbye to our friends, but also excited at our next step.

Prayers and Support

Your continued prayers are especially needed over these last 50 days in Nicaragua. Pray that we finish strong and also that we are diligent to do the work needed for a smooth transition. The position that Frank has accepted at AIM is partially support raised and our goal is to raise $1500 a month in support. We will begin the support raising process in the next few weeks. If you would like to help make this opportunity possible, you can give by clicking here. Please email us if you have any questions.

Here’s some stories from the past month:
On Leadership
Juan and His Yankee Friends
I’m Sorry, Did You Say Two Drill Bits?

Also, you can find pictures and updates by becoming a fan on Facebook or by following us on Twitter.

We love you guys and can’t wait to see you and tell you how God has worked in and through us over the past year.

Love,
Frank and Rebekah Burder

• Juan’s Legs
• Juan and His Yankee Friends

We checked Juan into the hospital last week so that they could go ahead and do some new blood tests (the original ones they took are no longer valid due to the amount of time that has passed) and get some antibiotics going to help with the swelling in his leg. The plan was to operate soon but they did not tell me when so I wished Juan well and told him that I would call him later to check up on him.

Two days later I received this text message:

Hello, this is dr lopez from lenin fonseca, we need some things for juan’s surgery, a liquid called SOLETE, can be bought at ORTOMED in BELLO HORIZONTE, and two drill bits with diamond tip for concrete, can be found in any hardware store, please call me if doubts.

After reading this I thought, “So just to be clear, you want me to go to a medical supply store in a city an hour a way and find some liquid called Solete and then did you say you needed me to bring you two concrete drill bits?” FYI (and maybe too much info) the drill bits are so they can drill into his leg and clean out the years of infection that has set into his bone

As crazy as this request sounds (and maybe I’ve lived here too long) I immediately started to figure out a way to make this happen because if living here has taught me anything it’s that there is a system in place and you will make yourself crazy fighting this system with an American mentality. It’s best to figure out a way to work within the system. We’ve come this far with Juan and I’m not about to let this little  obstacle  debunk his surgery. Drill bits? Check. Now where is this Solete stuff and how do I buy some?

Yesterday, Milton and I hopped on a bus and then took a taxi around town and found the things we needed. We then went to hospital where we found the ever-smiling Juan patiently waiting in a 8′ x 10′ room with three other patients (and no dividing curtains). After visiting for a bit, we left and the doctor told me that they would be operating on Juan this Saturday or Monday at the latest with a promise of a phone call when the surgery was over to tell me how it went. Praise God.

I joke around about receiving a text like this because honestly I have no idea what else to do with it. It breaks my heart that this is the only viable medical option for most of the people here. Our roommates (who have good jobs) were forced to go to the “free” hospital to have their baby and the mother ended up with an infection that kept her in the hospital for an extra 2 weeks. It’s no wonder that Juan is terrified to trust the system that got him into this mess to begin with. I’m sure he has thought many times that he would have been better off having just dealt with bowed legs his entire life. Wouldn’t that be better than this extremely painful bone infection?

Update on Juan coming soon…

Jesus forbids institutional violence because, ultimately, every person in the world is related. We are all children of the same God. All wars are civil wars. In the reign of God, Jews and Palestinians, Tutsis and Hutus, U.S. citizens and “illegal aliens,” Christians and Muslims, are neighbors. We are to treat one another with utmost respect and honor, the very way we want to be treated ourselves.”

“The kingdom Jesus preaches claims no land, defends no space, has no interest in political systems. It does not need to pass laws to take care of the needy; it just assumes the responsibility in a way that is decentralized, organic, sustainable, and local. It looks to serve and to place others before itself; it is content in recession and prosperity. It fasts to feed the needy. It creates no coinage, has no positions of power, and has no army. It works quietly within the old systems, not trying to change laws through powerful conventions, but simply living as if that reality already existed. Or to use the language of Jesus, ‘The kingdom of God is here now!’”

[excerpt from No Shortage of Messiahs by Matt Nederlanden]

I am here with a friend named Juan. I’ve been here with him 6 or 7 times now trying to have a surgery that he desperately needs. This should-be-easy process is complicated for many reasons. I’ll do my best to explain.

First, let’s talk about the hospital. This is the hospital in Managua that is free to all Nicaraguans. Sounds great right? But this free hospital is run by people that are not qualified to run a hospital. That’s the first problem. The second is the “system” that is in place here. It seems so ridiculous.  You are handed a slip of paper from your doctor when you have an appointment. To get back into the hospital you need this piece of paper. The security guard will not let you in the door without it. Once you figure out how to get in you wait. Everyone waits. No sign in. No number system. No snack machines, books, magazines – nothing.

Now let’s talk about Juan. Shortly after we got here last August, another crazy couple came down to work with us. Their names are Joe and Julie (Joe is pictured right with Juan). They have some medical training so they started volunteering at the local hospital with another friend of ours – Seth. The three of them met Juan during their visits to the hospital and as they became friends they learned more about his story (you can find Seth’s post about Juan here). Juan had surgery 15 years ago to correct his bowed legs. His left leg healed fine but his right leg did not. The doctors put some screws in his leg damaging it further and the leg never fully healed. He also has a bone condition called osteopetrosis (or “stone bone”) which means his bones are extremely hard, making it very difficult to operate.

He has had a bone infection for 15 years now. Joe, Julie, the Hickersons and Seth decided they would help Juan get the care he needed so they took him to a better hospital to get a professional opinion and some x-rays. After this, he was all set to go back to the free hospital so he could have the surgery there. Seth continued to go back with Juan only to be re-scheduled or given any number of other excuses just to not operate that day. Seth must have gone to the hospital with Juan 10 times. When it came time for Seth to leave, I offered to take this over for him never having met Juan. In my attempt to let my yes be yes – this is where we are now.

I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to live with a bone infection for 15 years. The doctors describe the open sores that expose his bone as “volcanoes”. Juan needs a miracle. His entire life has been changed by this. He has never walked like a normal man. There is no doubt that if Juan was born in America he would be walking today. This hospital is Juan’s only choice and you could argue that it is the hospital’s fault that his leg is in this condition in the first place. I’m looking at him now and he looks terrified at the thought of having to stay here again – scarred with what happened here when he was a boy. He tells me that if I’m not with him, they will not even see him or ignore him all together. Without his “Yankee friends” he says he’s hopeless.

Juan makes a very difficult journey to get to the hospital from his home in Tipitapa. The hour long bus ride is very painful and this morning he fell really hard while getting out of the bus in Managua. It took him 10 minutes of sitting down for the pain to subside enough for us to make the 20 minute cab ride to the hospital.

Most of the people I work with here in Granada have difficult circumstances today because of bad decisions they made in the past. This is not the case with Juan. He has never struggled with addiction. He has no self-destructive behaviors or compulsions plaguing his life. In fact, despite his circumstances, he spreads joy everywhere he goes. He talks to everyone and they instantly love him. His joy is contagious, heart-warming and encouraging. He truly is a blessing to know and be around.

So why am I here? I am here because I believe in a God that hears the cry of his people. I believe in a God that wants to heal Juan’s leg. I am here because, as my friend Joe Kidd put it, “The Lord has won the war and is much bigger than the stupid Nica system and any of satan’s forces working with it!”.

Leadership isn’t something I’ve sought out in the past. I’m happier being a follower, and am at my best when I have a leader I can trust and job duties that are easily checked off a list. Because I’ve seen ineffective leaders, I avoided leadership roles out of fear.

–>warning, rabbit trail ahead.

Proving, once again, that God has a sense of humor (hello ability to pass gas!) God called us to a place that has shown me how to trust, but removed my lists. Sure, I have lists for groceries and for my basic duties here but most of what we do here is relationship based, and as you probably know relationships don’t come with a list.

and rabbit trail done<–

Through a series of events, God had given me the desire to lead a short term trip. Frank and I discussed it, and he agreed that God had placed this calling on my life. I emailed a friend at Adventures in Missions and asked to be put on the list if an opportunity opened up. He responded that the trips had been booked for the summer, but that he would keep me in mind.

A month later, another staff member emailed me and asked me to lead an Ambassador trip. From what I know, these two staff members had not communicated with each other. God had given my name to the staff member. I signed up for the trip, not knowing all of the details.

Then I received the email with details, including that part of the trip would take place in Ometepe. Frank would not be with me. I thought, “Oh boy! This isn’t what I signed up for.” Which is typical of most major commitments, but because God had confirmed this calling in several ways, I accepted it when it didn’t go the way I though it would.

Things I learned and felt while on the trip…

I could feel prayers covering me. The most obvious being that I found it easier to show myself grace and to make mistakes without allowing discouragement and feelings of failure to seep into my identity. The day after the trip ended, a lot of these doubts started coming back. I’m assuming this is when parents and leaders stopped praying in full force for the trip.

The last week was the hardest. My patience wore thin, and I snapped more at the girls during that trip than the rest of the trip combined. I didn’t handle difficult situations as well as I could have. Mostly because I was so tired and hadn’t had any time to myself.

A month long trip allows you to just start getting into the surface. Serious issues aren’t really uncovered in a month.

Leadership requires getting your hands dirty. You have to serve when you don’t want to serve. Answer questions when you have already answered 50. Be nice when you feel like being mean.

Leadership requires a desire to learn and knowledge that you will not be perfect.

Leadership requires humility and courage to apologize and make things right when you make mistakes. Something I’m still working on.

Leadership requires leading by example. If you gossip or tear other people down, the people who follow you will do the same. If you cheat or cut corners, so will they. If you grumble or complain, they will take this as permission to do the same.

God is real and active. We had a moment when we were praying where one of the girls had a vision of bright light surrounding us. At the same time, another girl opened her eyes while praying and saw streams of light flowing through us. Coincidence, I think not.